Peace, one and all…
The calligraphy above is a beautiful rendering of an important Sufi aphorism:
‘The [Sufi] Paths [to God], all of them, consist of adab !
(Source: Alan Godlas)
Adab is an important, multi-layered Islamic concept. The word conveys notions of mannerliness, refinement, politeness, education and civility. Perhaps the most comprehensive definition I have personally encountered is ‘appropriate action’. That is, each new moment has its own unique adab, its own appropriate word or deed or state. Interacting with others has its own form of adab, as does each unfolding moment of our ongoing relationship with Divinity. Adab forms an essential part of Mevlevi practice. I wanted to share a recent personal experience that has helped open the way a little.
We recently celebrated Eid al-Fitr. We went out for an evening meal at a local restaurant. My two youngest sons, 4 and 6, were rather naughty. Upon reflection, they weren’t that bad and it was a bit too late for them. At any rate, at the time I found myself embarrassed by their behaviour, and thus a bit grumpy with them. On the way home, my wife reminded me of an important point: if we don’t take them them to places, how will they ever learn to behave appropriately.
These words hit home, and called to mind the merciful grace of my teachers, who have overlooked so many unhelpful things in me. It was no coincidence therefore that this issue came up in the very next Journey Through the Masnavi study group.
Behaviour is an interesting word, being one of the key meanings of adab. In the Masnavi serif, Hazret-i Pir says this
‘And if you cannot become one at the threshold,
at least hear from me the following tale’
(1.2242, updated Nicholson)
The word translated as ‘threshold’ is astan. It marks the threshold of the tekke, the place where our shoes are stored before we enter, and thus the place where we learn to embody adab. Hazret-i Pir’s turbe is also a threshold, and is known as the Asitane-i Aliyye (or the ‘Exalted Threshold’). Above the entrance is hung a beautiful couplet, which runs thus approximately:
‘This is the Kaaba of lovers,
those who entered here became complete’
The threshold marks the entrance to the beating heart, to the sacred space in which we learn how to love and be transformed by love. Learning the manners of the path (its adab) is essential. It is critical that we engage as deeply as we can with the forms of the Way, and the truths they point to, as they are designed to help us let go of ourselves. And yet, in the centre of this struggle, there is a paradox. The nafs loves to cling to form, believing that the form itself is the be-all and end-all. If our practice stays at the level of ritual, focusing solely on outward form, we can lose sight of inward meaning, of its essence and purpose. It is a difficult balancing act, and one designed to bring our issues to the fore, to help us see ourselves clearly.
As Mevlevi tradition teaches, the first book of the Masnavi serif is all about the nafs, and the things it clings to. This is certainly how this one has experienced it. Through both overt and more subtle means, Mevlana repeatedly brings us face to face with ourselves, revealing just how tightly we cling to this world. I am so grateful that Allah has guided me to two beautiful Masnavi study circles: Journey Through the Masnavi and Rumi’s Circle.
Although there is no real finishing line, no real end point, going through book one with these two groups has helped prepare the ground for this particular moment. As such, my heart heard a number of important truths from this couplet. Firstly, you don’t have to pretend. You don’t yet know how to become one, to move beyond your ordinary duality. You are merely a beginner. You know this really. Imbibe adab and follow the Way. At each stage of your journey home, listen to me and together we shall gradually learn to see beyond these ‘stories’ I am sharing. If you listen deeply, I shall guide you across the real threshold.
This couple bring great comfort to this heart. Firstly, I hear the voice of Hz. Pir speaking directly to me. I cherish those moments. I have always experienced Mevlana as a grandfather-figure. Hz. Pir’s voice often breaks the fourth wall, so to speak, to remind us that these aren’t just stories, they are the Way itself.
Secondly, Mevlana makes a deep point about adab. Adab is a process (The Shape of Adab) and not a static thing. It is ongoing and not a piece of information. Ultimately, as I have struggled to grow, I have come to understand adab as something more like harmonisation – a process of gradually aligning the soul with God, of learning and embodying what it is that the Divine wants from us in each new moment and circumstance. This, quite naturally, takes work – indeed, it is the work of a lifetime.
I have seen this harmonisation at work myself. Al hamdu lillah, this one has been blessed to regularly attend our Mevlevi zikr gathering for a number of years. There was a moment, several years in, when things just clicked and our group harmonised. There was a notable shift, when our adab deepened a little. That harmonisation (which I do not confuse with the end of the path) was dependent upon regular attendance, deep listening and gentle companionship. It required us to learn how to be in companionship with each other, to be in sohbet with each other. Our teachers continued to guide us as we were learning these lessons, they held our hands and led us across the threshold of our expectations that we might slowly learn to sit at the true inward threshold, at God’s door. It is love’s work. It is God’s work. And what a humbling realisation that has been! Allah!
Thirdly, we sometimes feel a sense of guilt and shame when confronted with our actual reality. As I have seen this in myself many times. Whilst it is important to understand growth as more than mere intellectual learning, to dwell overlong on emotions of guilt and shame is itself a product of egoistic thinking. The nafs loves to feel proud of itself, and if it can’t feel pride in achievement it will seek pride in these darker places. Ultimately, the place of our resistance is also the place of our real work. Understanding this is actually a cause of surprising joy (the unveiling of the soul’s faults). To make real progress, it is important to keep going, to keep turning up, to keep returning to presence. In many ghazals, Mevlana urges us to silence, to still the outward tongue, that we might hear speech beyond speech.
The notion of astane, the place where we remove our shoes, reminds me of the story of beloved Musa (as). As he reached the place of encounter with God, with the burning bush, he was told to remove his shoes:
‘Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground’ (Exodus 3:5)
The Quran repeats this:
‘I am your Lord. Take off your shoes: you are in the sacred valley of Tuwa’ (Quran 20:14)
It is adab that requires us to remove our shoes, the outer coverings of convention and our own fixations on form. It is only through conscious practice that we can be opened, that we can truly enter into the sacred valley of our heart. Adab also teaches us to have an open ear, that might hear the truth of ourselves, and an open eye, that our inward sight might remain fixed on the Divine (Until there was Despair).
Beloved Hz. Uftade, one of the saints of Bursa, speaks of this in a beautiful poem. Allah!
You have to come soon to the Real
You have to find His wise ones
If you truly cannot find them
With all your soul and with all your heart,
you must love.
Those who have loved have found them
Their souls have reached the Real
Their faith has become whole
With all your soul and with all your heart,
you must love.
Always trace out their tracks
Listen to their beautiful discourse
If you say you would like to see their faces
With all your soul and with all your heart,
you must love.
This dervish, this unhappy Uftade,
Has become a beggar on the road to God
May God fulfill his desire
With all your soul and with all your heart,
you must love.
Hazret Mehmed Muhyiddin Uftade
Adab Ya HU!
Abdur Rahman's Corner 
What a beautiful beautiful read! Thank you. God bless you.
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